Honestly I think that every girl has said that to herself one or more times in her life.
Sadly, I don’t think I have said it to myself enough.
And no, this is not going to be a “boys suck, woe is me” kinda post. This is just me stating the obvious. Stating the fact that more girls need to be able to say this and realize this before it is too late.
When it comes to being with others, significant others to be more exact, there are some things that have to be taken into perspective. But more so, if this is your multiple time trying to be with said person, you really need to think things through.
If the person you think you want, has done you wrong in the past then you have to listen to your brain rather than your heart.
Your heart tells you lies.
Your brain makes you realize these lies.
But yes, people can change. But no, not all the time.
For example, my trust for Ryan will never be fully there nor will Brandon’s trust for me.
And yes, it is nice to give people second chances, everyone deserves a second chance once in a while but when you are giving someone three, or four or seven chances, you need to reevaluate things.
There is a huge difference between giving someone chances and getting used.
“I hate him. I love him. I would never be with him again.”
For the most part, Ryan is a good person. He makes the shittiest decisions in this world. He broke my heart. He is NOT boyfriend material. At all.
I hate him. I love him. I would never in a million years be with him ever again.
I hate Dustin for being a dad. I love him for who he used to be. I would never try to be with him ever again.
See how easy that is for me to say? Do you know how long it took me to realize all of this?
Way longer than it should have.
We get blinded by what we think is love. We get blinded on what our other half makes us believe is real love. We get blinded on what we think love is and what we want it to be.
I want to be able to say
“I hate him. I love him. And I never want to be with anyone else besides him.”